


A Life Taken, A Future Given

by cassandra_sees



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Gen, Pre-Slash, Reincarnation, Spoilers for 5.13
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-31
Updated: 2012-12-31
Packaged: 2017-11-23 02:54:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/617301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassandra_sees/pseuds/cassandra_sees
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So it was Arthur's destiny to fall by Mordred's hand? To die in the hour of their greatest victory?<br/>Well, in that case… Screw destiny!</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Life Taken, A Future Given

**Author's Note:**

> This happened after watching 'The Diamond of the Day' and loving it and hating it and then loving it and... well, you all know how that goes. So basically this is a little bit of therapeutical writing because I maybe got a little emotionally invested there for a bit. Like spn season 5-level invested! And since I am rather fond of the whole Team Free Will-philosophy I could not believe Merlin would just let Arthur die without trying because the Dragon and Destiny said so. Thus I wrote my own self-indulgent little fix-it. One of many I'm guessing.  
> Big thanks and love as always to Moira85 for the super-fast beta and for putting up with me and my whining.  
> If you are concerned about the Major Character Death-Warning please read the notes at the end for further information.

_"Merlin, there is nothing you can do."_

_"I've failed?"_

_"No young warlock, for all you have dreamt of building as come to pass."_

_"I can't lose him! He's my friend!"_

_"Though no man, no matter how great, can know his destiny, some lives have been foretold, Merlin. Arthur is not just a king. He is the once and future king. Take heart, for when Albion's need is greatest, Arthur will rise again. It has been a privilege to have known you young warlock. The story we have been a part of, will live long in the minds of men."_

 

Merlin could hardly look at the Great Dragon as it took flight, ambling though the sky on nearly useless wings. At that moment though, Merlin had no place in his heart to feel pity for the once magnificent creature. All he could feel was the empty despair that had come over him with the Dragon's words.

This was supposed to be Arthur's destiny? Being ripped away from his life much too young just when all they had fought so hard for had finally been won, when all their foes had finally been defeated? When Merlin had finally dared to reveal the truth and Arthur had accepted him for what and who he was?

It was nothing but unfair to think that Arthur would never live to experience truly peaceful times when all he had ever wanted was peace and prosperity for his lands and his people. Instead – adding insult to injury – if the Dragon was to be right, he would be doomed to lie around for centuries to come, only to rise again to fight in a new war, against a new foe that Merlin could not even fathom quite yet.

No! This could not be it. This could not be how it all ended.

So it was Arthur's destiny to fall by Mordred's hand? To die in the hour of their greatest victory?

Well, in that case… Screw destiny!

Screw destiny so very much. If Merlin really was the greatest sorcerer to ever walk the earth changing one measly foretold fate should not be all that hard for him to do.

After all, when had he ever listened to what Kilgharrah had to say? And yes, maybe he should have killed both Morgana and Mordred when he had the chance. But Merlin liked to think that it had made him a better man to refuse to kill a young boy and an innocent young woman without reason even though they might have ultimately turned into the monsters the Dragon had believed them to be. At least Merlin had not become a monster with them. And he would certainly not stand idly by when the person who meant most to him in the world was facing a fate that in Merlin's eyes was worse than death.

He refused to give up just like that. To give Arthur up when he needed him most.

 

Stumbling to his feet, vision still blurred by tears, Merlin used his magic to gently lift Arthur up and carry him down to the lake. For a second his steps faltered when he reached the water's edge but then he simply whispered a word of power that caused the lakebed to rise upward to meet his feet wherever he stepped. After all, he had finally learned to unleash his full power in the Crystal Cave. In a weird way he had Morgana to thank for that, he supposed.

 

Upon reaching the island Merlin climbed up the gentle slope towards the black monolith in its centre. He could feel the powerful ancient magic of the Sidhe surrounding him but he could also feel that it wouldn't be them who would be able to save Arthur.

After all, the apparition of his father had said it: he would find all the magic he could ever need within himself.

Still, it wasn't exactly as if his newfound power had come with a manual.

He had felt so full of purpose on his way here. Even while Arthur was steadily slipping away from him on their journey through the woods he had felt like he was heading for something.

Now he felt insecurity creep in. After all, he had left the fixed framework of their shared destiny behind on the lakeshore and now he felt like navigating an endless foreign ocean without even the stars to guide him. It felt freeing but also horribly terrifying.

But he couldn't fail now.

Laying Arthur down on the grass, Merlin let his magic flow through him. He raised his hands over his king's body and whispered words of healing and power. He felt his magic leap towards Arthur like an eager dog to its master's heel but he could also feel the terrible cold of death that surrounded Arthur and didn't lift from his heart or limbs, no matter how desperately Merlin battled against it.

He did not know how long he strained, how many spells he used, how many times he just tried to force his power into Arthur's lifeless body but it was all to no avail.

Merlin felt desperate tears stream down his face yet again and he screamed his pain towards the skies. This could not be. The Dragon could not have been right. He couldn't have. This wasn't fair.

Drawing upon every last vestige of his power Merlin was ready to force one final desperate push of magic into Arthur's body.

"Merlin, no."

The hand on his shoulder was cold and gentle, the voice in his ear soft and full of compassion. And yet, Merlin felt the dread sweep over him like icy water. This couldn't be happening. Not after all they had been through.

"Morgana?"

But she didn't look like the Morgana he had left for dead in the woods. She had the same pale skin and long black hair, but she was wearing a simple white gown instead of the dark elaborate dresses she seemed to favour and her face and eyes looked kind. Almost like the Morgana he had known and cared for so long ago.

"Not quite."

The smile she gave him was beautiful and made Merlin long for the simpler days, when the four of them had been almost like a family.

"I don't understand."

"The Morgana you knew hardened her heart against any and all emotion besides hate and wrath. It poisoned her and let to her ultimate defeat. But she was a priestess of the Old Religion. She was a powerful sorceress and she used to possess a good heart. As you know magic is no more good or evil than a simple sword but with people born of magic like you and her it lives within the heart of its wielder. When Morgana died, her magic was set free and her magic remembered you as the friend you used to be to her. That's why they send me here."

"I still don't… Are you saying you're Morgana's magic?"

"I am in a way the Morgana she could have been. But I'm here as a representative of magic itself. A mouthpiece for the Goddess if you will."

"And what do you want? To tell me again how there is nothing I can do? How this is all as it should be. If so, you are wasting your time, because I am NOT LISTENING!"

Merlin roared the last words, unleashing a burst of power towards this strange semblance of Morgana but the woman just smiled sadly, not even her hair moving in the gust of wind Merlin had created.

"Emrys, please calm down and listen to me. We understand that. We have always known that Arthur's destiny would play out this way. It was foretold, just like the Dragon said…"

Merlin opened his mouth to protest but not quite-Morgana raised her hand and shook her head.

"Please let me speak first, Emrys. We thought we understood the future. We thought you would be content to know that your dream of a united Albion came true and that Arthur would rise again in the future to defend again what once was his, but we see now that we have been mistaken. There is one power that we have obviously underestimated. One power that is stronger in your heart than we would have imagined. After all you are the greatest sorcerer to ever walk the earth. You are Emrys. You are an immortal like us. We did not think that your human sheath would have so much influence on your soul."

Merlin could feel the irritation bubble up within him. Here he was standing over Arthur's dead body, arguing with a Morgana-shaped representation of the Old Religion about his humanity. He did not have the time or the patience for this.

"Listen… lady… whoever you are. Whatever you are. I'm not interested in how you think I should have reacted to all of this. Arthur is my friend and I'm not going to let him die gladly just because a dead mad-woman and a giant flying lizard think this is a good idea. I don't care what your plans were, because I'm not going along with them like a good mighty sorcerer. I am going to fight this tooth and nail with everything I have. And if you try to stop me I'll have to consider you my enemy and destroy you like I destroyed your army of Saxons."

"I understand that, Emrys. We all do. That's why I was sent here to make you an offer."

"What kind of offer? And who exactly send you?"

"I told you, I am the mouthpiece of the Goddess and therefore I stand before you as an emissary of the Old Religion itself and all its disciples. And I can offer you that what you most desire."

"You can bring Arthur back to life?"

The hope that raced through Merlin's body was almost painful in its intensity but the woman just shook her head, eyes filled with regret.

"That I cannot do. No one can succeed in this endeavour, not even you, Emrys. Not with all the power at your disposal. Arthur has played his part in this life and now his path here has come to an end. Not even the most powerful magic can change that."

"Then there is nothing you can give me."

"But I think there is. Do you not wish for Arthur to live in a time of peace? For him to enjoy the happiness and bliss his toils and sacrifices have brought for this land?"

"But you just said…"

"I can't give him back his life here and now, Emrys. And even if I could it would bring neither of you much joy. In fact, reviving this shell of your king will only bring despair for both of you. What I can give however, is a new life. Another life. And should you so wish it many more lives beyond."

"You mean instead of staying dead until he is needed to fight again he could be reborn again and again and live through many happy lives? Where is the catch?"

The white Morgana cocked her head to the side and gave Merlin a look that was almost painfully like the Morgana of before.

"You know very well, my dear Emrys, that no one can guarantee that all his lives will be happy ones. In fact, it is almost certain that he will have to live through pain and war and despair many times, but with every life there will always be the chance of joy. And unlike this time from now on his destiny will be truly his own. The paths of all his future lives will remain firmly in his own hands. But there will be a price."

"What kind of price? Name it."        

"Well, Emrys, you for one will refrain from waging eternal war against everything the Old Religion holds dear. But there must also be something else. You know what the first rule of all is. You know the laws woven into the very fabric of our power. You know that for every life given…"

"Another life must be taken away. Yes, I have learned that particular lesson very well by now. The question that remains though is which life will be taken for every new life you give to Arthur."

"You have indeed learned your lessons well, my friend. You have learned in the Crystal Cave that you are supposed to be eternal. You were supposed to be the immortal guardian, waiting for the day Arthur would have to return. Ready to be by his side again. If you accept our offer, this will not come to pass. If you accept our offer, it will be your eternal life that will pay for Arthur's. Are you ready to give this? To make this final sacrifice for your king?"

There was steel now behind the green eyes but they didn't look evil or merciless. They looked expectant and maybe a little hopeful.

It was not even a real decision to make for Merlin.

"If that is what it takes. If I have to give my own life to save Arthur I will gladly do so. Living forever is worth nothing if it means I have to leave him here cold and dead. Yes, I accept your offer and I am willing to pay your price. I was ready to die for him as soon as I knew him and that hasn't changed since."

The smile that broke over Morgana's features was beyond beautiful and full of joy.

"I am glad to hear you say this, because now I am able to give you my final gift. Yes, we will take your eternal life, but in exchange you will live every new life with Arthur. Every time he comes into this world anew, you will be with him. For better or for worse. But be aware that every time he dies your life is also forfeit because you must pay the required price of one life every time a new life is given to your king. Starting now."

While she spoke a dense fog rose out of the ground and the lake and the air around them, shrouding them in a veil of white, blocking the world around them from view.

Merlin could feel himself fading, his life leaving his body like it was joining the fog around them but he was not afraid. He knew that the next time he would wake up he would be with Arthur again. And this time maybe they could just be happy.

There was one final thing though, one final thing he needed to do.

"Morgana?"

"Yes, Emrys."

"I'm truly sorry. I feel that if I had dared to reveal myself to you earlier, things might have been different. I don't regret a lot of things in this past life but I do regret that I wasn't a better friend to you."

This time it truly was their old Morgana that smirked at him superiorly.

"Well, Merlin. I hope you will remember this. Maybe you'll get a chance to make it all up to me. Next time."

"Next time?"

But Merlin was already gone before the words could truly leave his lips.

 

 

...

 

_I don't know. About maybe 1500 years later? Yeah, let's stick with that until someone really proves me wrong_

 

Merlin was woken up by someone vigorously shaking his shoulder and very persistently yelling into his ear.

"Merlin, goddamn it. I swear if you don't bloody wake up right now I'm going to dump an entire bucked of ice water unto your useless no-good head!"

"Jesus, mother. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you? And also: don't you dare to cuss at me young man. I should really just let you sleep in and be late for you very first day at your new school. That would teach you."

"That would teach me absolutely nothing, mother, owing to the fact that I really, really don't want to go to that stupid fancy school you are all so excited about."

"Oh hush now, Merlin. You know very well that going to Camelot Academy is an incredible opportunity for you. And your uncle Gaius did go to great length to make sure you got accepted even though we can barely afford the school uniform, let alone the tuition fees. We are so lucky that Uther Pendragon is one of Gauis's patients."

"A great opportunity to get pushed around and bullied by a bunch of stuck-up, inbred, elitist little rich kids. Yes, so lucky indeed."

"Merlin, come on. Give them a chance. I'm sure you will have a huge group of new friends in absolutely no time."

"Yeah, right, Mom. I'm sure they are all just waiting for a clumsy bumpkin like me whose mother thought that on top of unfortunate ears and gangly everything it would be a great idea to name her kid _Merlin_. Thanks again for that, by the way."

"Now that's about enough you ungrateful little brat. You are getting out of bed right now and you are going to be absolutely stoked to go to school today. Maybe all those well-mannered kids will be a good influence on you. That Pendragon boy for example. Such a nice young man. And so dashing."

"Yeah right. Arthur Pendragon, the king of the prats. I can't _wait_."

 

The end?

**Author's Note:**

> Canon compliant major character death and since there is talk of being reincarnated implied multiple major character deaths, I guess. This should not be read before watching 'The Diamond of the Day' because it's basically one big spoiler and on top of that wouldn't make all that much sense.


End file.
